I look in the mirror But don't recognize her. I feed her cold comfort But still cannot prise her Out of the hole She dives deep into And plunges her Everything into Not being Candy-sweet to you. She moves herself up And she throws herself down She looks back at me Whilst she spins round And round. She is holy in her terror She is trying to be better But the waves overwhelm her And I still cannot Save her. Her hands used to be Magnets for people and rings She used to write songs: She threw down Aces and Kings. She was wild and She was crazy She was free and Never once said Perhaps, later or maybe But instead jumped Right into the Yielding soft Center of things. I would say that I miss her And send princesses to kiss her I would tell her to breathe And for once stay And not leave. I would throw her a flower And cast her a line I would give her a gift Of the sandglass of time I would move heaven and earth Just to go back to her birth And smother the breath Out of the unrepentant Mess that Stares back at me.